diary of grace

God and God Alone

His name was Samuel Rutherford. He wasn’t perfect but he was a man of rare love. Love that was forged in the fire.

Samuel was an extremely dedicated Scottish minister in the 1600’s. He deeply cared for those in his care, and was dearly loved by his congregation in return. But even early in his ministry he was faced with heartbreak. After being married for a short 4 years, his precious wife became very ill and after battling with the illness for 13 months, died. Shortly afterwards, two of their three children and his mother also died. He was left alone and in very ill health himself to take care of his remaining child and care for his parish.

His trials didn’t end there. A few years later he was banished from his parish and exiled far from his beloved congregation because of his faithfulness to what he believed. This was exceedingly difficult for him. If there was anything he loved to do it was to expand the beauty of his Jesus to the people in his care. Now he was separated from them and prohibited from preaching.

The political situation in Scotland changed several years later and he was allowed to continue his ministry. During this time he remarried and he and his new wife had five children. It would seem that things had finally changed for the better. But not for long. Two of his dear children died as infants. Two more died while he was away in London. Before his own death at the age of 61, all of his children from both marriages had died. I can’t even begin to imagine what his father’s heart went through.

The way he related to this life of bitter experiences is clear from his own words…

“Think it not hard if you get not your will, nor your delights in this life; God will have you to rejoice in nothing but Himself.”

And again… “they lose nothing who gain Christ."

Spurgeon later quoted from one of his letters saying,

“dear Samuel Rutherford, when he wrote to a lady who had lost, I think, seven children, congratulated her and said, “I am sure that the well-Beloved has a strong affection for your ladyship, for He will have all your heart. He has taken away all these children that there may not be a nook or corner for anybody else but Him.”

His heart was captured by the love of the infinite. He willingly confessed that he was not his own…

“Since He looked upon me my heart is not my own. He hath run away to heaven with it.”

To lose all on earth was considered a very small sacrifice indeed to gain Christ. He wanted nothing but Jesus… Jesus was heaven.

“O my Lord Jesus Christ, if I could be in heaven without thee it would be hell; and if I could be in hell and have thee still it would be heaven to me, for thou art all the heaven I want."

I can’t help but be struck by such a love. It makes me examine my own. Is He really all I want? Is He my heaven?

So often I seem to think I deserve things here on earth… you know, that certain things are my right and it’s not fair if I don’t have them. And then I remember… I deserve nothing. Nothing but death. But because He loved me so much, He bore that for me and gave me the greatest gift in the universe— Himself. And I dare to think I deserve something more?

Oh my soul, claim nothing as your own.

For you there is God and God alone.

And really what could be sweeter? If I lose all I count dear, I still have Him… if I am called to walk through the valley of the shadow of death, He comes too… if I am asked to pour myself out for His people and receive nothing in return, He will give me Himself.

How can anything but gratitude ever formulate in my heart?

God alone! God alone!

In Your courts, oh my Lord, is my home

You are my treasure, my portion delight of my soul

My life, my salvation, my fortress

My God and my all.

I want Him to be my heaven. Nothing but Him. Because if it is, who says heaven can’t start now and increase in sweetness every time I’m called to bear a burden because in bearing it I find more of His heart?

Spurgeon again quotes Rutherford…

“…he speaks of the coals of divine wrath all falling upon the head of Christ, so that not one might fall upon His people. ‘And yet,’ saith he, ‘if one of those coals should drop from His head upon mine and did utterly consume me, yet if I felt it was a part of the coals that fell upon Him, and I was bearing it for His, and in communion with Him, I would choose it for my heaven. ‘"

Oh heart. Be still and think. Could I say that? Or do I still want things for myself?

or can I sing...

Once earthly joy I craved,

Sought peace and rest;

Now Thee alone I seek,

Give what is best.

This all my prayer shall be,

More love oh Christ to Thee

More love to Thee,

More love to Thee.

I’m willing to learn to claim nothing as my own. I want God and God alone.

Jesus, mold our hearts so that you are all the heaven we want…

Because, after all, we are all the heaven You want.

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Hannah Rayne

​22. INFJ. Lover of Jesus. Dean. Bible Teacher. Graduate of Masters of Biblical Counseling.

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